Sunday, April 10, 2011

Introduction

After being in management in various industry sectors for over fifteen years, I have had numerous difficult conversations with employees, clients, bosses, and co-workers.  In fact, I negotiated my salary with the partner of the firm I worked for two years after I graduated from college.  In my eighteen years of career, I have had nine jobs, changed career twice.  I delivered bad news to clients in numerous occasions whether it was related to increased fees due to overbudget or deliverables not met.  Furthermore, I have had a great deal number of conversations with employees about their performance and year-end evaluation results.  All of these conversations had one thing in common.  They all involved me delivering news contrary to the other party's expectations or desires.  Of course, some of these conversations were more successful then others.  Nonetheless, over the year I have developed the ability to have these conversations without damaging the relationships and the ability to reach some common understanding for us to move forward.  Recently, I have come to the realization that such skill though highly valuable to all, is not common to all.  I suppose that it is only human to want to be liked and not be rejected.  Having these conversations really put us in situations where we are vulnerable to rejections.  After all, it is just easier to pretend that everything is fine.  Experience tells me that things are never fine if issues are not addressed.  Avoiding these conversations could result in resentment which ultimately will damage the relationships whether we like it or not.  It could also result in unproductivity since it would be unlikely employees would apply themselves at work if they are unhappy.

Coaching is the buzz word these days.  Some companies provide senior level people executive coaches nowaday.  A few companies have some forms of coaching program available to all employees.  Unfortunately, for too many people, that kind of support is not available at work.  I hope to use this blog to share some of my own experience in having difficult conversations on an ongoing basis.  Some will be success stories, some will not be.  Either way, I hope that we could learn together on this endeavor as I truly believe that if we master this skill, our potential to reach our goals will be unlimited.  If you have any specific scenario that you would like to share and get input, please feel free to post them as well and I will do my best to brainstorm ideas with you.  It is my hope that this blog will become a free coaching support network where we help each other.

Let the journey begins!

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